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Getting ready for a date - above 30

Getting ready for a first date is always stressful, no matter how old you are. It doesn't matter if you know each other or it's a full on blind date, if you're not nervous on some level, you're a sociopath. Having that amount of confidence can't be healthy, go get yourself checked.

I do not recall many dates from my teenage years. Things just... happen when you're a teenager. I do remember one date though, he took me to the movies - basic classic. I don't think I got very anxious while getting ready - I met the guy the weekend before outside the club while he was throwing up, it didn't really matter how I looked on that date. In the cinema. In the dark. I've already won.

In my twenties it was game on. I didn't take very long to doll up, let's be honest here, you'll never look as hot as when you're in your twenties. Guys also don't look at your face that much, you still got that hot bod going on, regardless the three times per week visits to McDonald's and that you have alcohol for dinner every other night. No, they don't care about your face that much then.

But in your thirties. In your thirties they look. What are they looking for? Desperation. They bring a thermometer to the date to check your temperature for baby fever. They observe your finger looking for a tattooed X to mark where the ring goes. They look for reasons to keep looking. So what do you do?

Here's what you do.

You take long. Long. To get ready. Getting ready starts with mental preparation from the moment they ask you out. Or you ask them out - good for you if you can do that, I couldn't hide my desperation that well. You get ready mentally for spending hours trying to be the best version of yourself. Inside and outside. Apart from constantly fixing your hair, your make-up, your bra, the stupid thong you put on hoping just for a little action - but less than sex because you're looking for something serious now but he shouldn't know that right away -, you also need to hide your emotional baggage under the table you're having the drinks at and kick it sometimes when it wants to open by itself. You need to act like you have your shit together, that's what they expect from you above thirty - which let's be honest none or very few of us has. I personally haven't gotten my shit together since it was all in a diaper. You might as well just say fuck it, I'm just gonna be myself, if that scares him away, he better go now! Yea? How's that been workin' out for ya?
I'm not saying we become or should become completely different people on a first date, all I'm saying is you might not want to start off by telling them about your ex that left you because you were constantly nagging them about getting married for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

You think that is a lot to keep under control?
Try going on a date during a pandemic!

Make-up tips: don't forget to focus on the eyes as the bottom half of your face will be covered by an ugly face mask so those beautiful lips that you usually bite so sexy that makes you look like a zombie who hasn't been fed for three weeks won't be visible.

While you keep all of the above in order, don't forget about social distancing and also that there is literally nothing to do. After weeks or even months of texting each other day and night - if you found one that was willing to communicate that much with zero action ahead - when the lockdown lifts a little and you finally find a date-worthy activity, keep in mind that you won't be able to stand up mid-drink and pretend you have an emergency just because you don't like your date. Bars, the ultimate date-scenes became illegal. Let's take a moment of silence here.

No, what we have now is
car rides - kidnappers' dream! Please don't sit in strangers' cars.
Long walks - I can't stress the "long" enough. You can't turn the other way saying you need to leave because everybody knows that you have nothing to do and nowhere else to be. Also, you've always hated hiking, a virus won't change that. Stop pretending.
Drive-in cinema - WHAT IF I HAVE TO PEE?! (Also, don't sit in strangers' cars.)

And let's not forget about the kissing part. That's illegal these days. Not gonna happen - unless they are so hot that you would like to risk being on life support system for weeks in a hospital, but that's a life decision I wouldn't support, you decide. You'll go home after your date and keep texting at best - if you didn't scare them away by being 30 and knowing what you want.

Good luck!

V

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